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10-07-2008, 07:54 PM
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As much as advice is good, trying to pull something off you aren't used to comes off as contrived and awkward. Pulling girls isn't and shouldn't be an act. Either you need to be yourself or go through a whole mindset change where you believe they will come to you and if she doesn't than she is just another girl. Cultivating that mindset isn't something that can take place on a message board.
Either that, or trying to play games backfires a lot. When two people come into each other with gameplay, no one wins. Either defenses are up on both sides or you both try to have that 'I don't care' mindset and nothing happens because neither gives in. I had a girl try that a few weeks ago and try to play games ("I can call other guys") and I told her to. I haven't talked to her since then. That said, if you do talk to her, keep the calls short. I hate talking on the phone anyways, but you shouldn't be dragging it out. Call her, get things set up, and thats it. If you text, send one text and see how long that rides. Don't send another. Quote:
Stop worrying, relax, and stop trying to analyze everything. It's just going to get you paranoid, and no one likes a paranoid dude. Go lift, go have a beer, smoke some weed, play some video games, just stop worrying about this so much. Because you know what? When it comes down to it, she is just a girl. Girls, just like us guys, are always replaceable.
__________________
At some point you realize everyone has a 'best-by' date like milk. Even later you realize that most everyone has already passed theirs. 
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10-07-2008, 08:34 PM
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 Some of us are just NOT replaceable.
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10-07-2008, 08:50 PM
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haha
I agree, everybodys replaceable, its not always desirable to have to replace someone though.
__________________
"Show me a good loser, and I'll show you a loser."
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10-07-2008, 09:34 PM
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Dude, what movie is it when this dude can't get the girl and his buddy says like "just bang a girl that looks like her." LOL sorry I had to drop that in there.
Don't get down, what will be will be, put a bit of effort in, if she doesn't do squat back, forget about her. Just don't go on obsessing over a girl that you don't even really know. Or you could keep obsessing over her. Make her a hair doll LOL.
__________________
Every time you hit him with a shot it's got to feel like he tried kissing the express train. Yeah, let’s start buildin some hurtin bombs.
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10-07-2008, 10:50 PM
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I hear what you guys are saying. I don't know why I thought we "had" to go out today, because there is always next week or the week after. I went against the advice and tried to call once more today in the afternoon and the phone still said "wireless customer unavailable".
Do you guys think its possible her phone is'nt working or do you think she unplugged it b/c it rang twice first? btw, we do live about 30 miles apart. And like I said, I have never had a cell phone and have never texted either. I probably should have got her e-mail too. Anyway, I just don't understand why she did'nt call back and at least acknowledge she got the message or something. I would think that would be common courtesy unless she's old-fashioned and thinks the guy has to call first (or her phone is messed up). I did'nt know what I was going to say anyway if she answered, besides just seeing if she wanted to go get something to eat like you guys said. So now I guess I'll just wait until the weekend and try to call once and if it does'nt go thru then I'll know something must be up and wait until the next Saturday when I'll see her at work. Who knows, she's young and maybe she is shy too, but she sure does'nt act like it...
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10-08-2008, 12:41 AM
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Quote:
 (Adds JennyD to the list) Damn thats a short list. I've got my mom, a few close girl friends that are honestly just friends and jenny :PBut, most are. Especially a girl from work. It may not be desirable but in the end, knowing there are always going to be other options makes rejection easier. Quote:
PS The shy ones are fun to break in.
__________________
At some point you realize everyone has a 'best-by' date like milk. Even later you realize that most everyone has already passed theirs.
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10-08-2008, 07:53 AM
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Quote:
__________________
Gettin' lean!
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10-08-2008, 08:02 AM
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it says that sometimes if shes doesn't have call waiting, or she could have given a fake number. You never know...
__________________
"Show me a good loser, and I'll show you a loser."
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10-08-2008, 12:12 PM
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Well, the first first (second) time I called, it went to voice mail after it answered with her name and it sounded like her. I left a message that time. But when I tried calling the next day in the late morning and afternoon, it said "wireless customer unavailable" right away the first time and then it rang twice and went to "w. c. u." the next time, so I'm thinking maybe she had it shut off or was in an area that does'nt pick up the signal good. I just don't want to keep calling and give the impression I'm desperate or something, but I should tried to get a hold of her at least once this week or weekend. I was thinking of trying to call at a different time, like after work, but it may be too late as she has kids in school. She does work 2nd shift like me, but I don't get home until almost midnight. Maybe I should try at right after 11 tomorrow when she should be getting off work since I don't work tomorrow?
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10-08-2008, 12:25 PM
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OK...stop calling this girl.
She may have given you her number because you asked her for it, and she didn't know how to turn you down. (I don't mean that to sound rude at all...I don't know if that's what she did either.) But you've put waaaaay too much effort and thought into this. You don't even really know this girl. The next time you see her at work, just mention that you tried calling her and see what her reaction is. Say something like, "oh, by the way, I tried giving you a call last week, but wasn't able to reach you"...if she says 'oh, yeah...my phone is shut off', then you know that's what happened. But if she says something like, 'oh, really?' like she didn't know...then you know she's just a girl that's playing games, and didn't really want to go out in the first place and she was just trying to avoid the situation all together. I think someone else said this already...but hot chicks get hit on all the time...she's probably used to this sort of thing by now if she's as hot as you say.
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10-09-2008, 12:31 AM
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Well, she is cute, but no supermodel. She probably does get hit on a lot, but I bet when most guys find out she has 3 small kids, that most likely turns them off. It made me stop and think about it for awhile, but I'm getting to the age that I don't think I'll have any of my own anyway. A girl at work, who I can talk to because we're not interested in other that way, said she is way to young for me and probably not worth the hassle with all those kids. She did'nt like it when I pointed out her bf is 10 years older than her, but she said, "yeah, but if he was 14 years older it would be too much". She said to not try to call again. I just want to be sure it was not her phone before I give up completely, but she has to know I tried to call at least once...
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10-13-2008, 12:33 AM
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update: I tried calling once more today, thinking maybe she'll pick up since its a weekend. No luck, I just left a call back number in case my other calls did'nt go thru. There were no messages when I got home from work, so I'm thinking you guys might be right and she's not interested. I sure did'nt get that vibe when I asked her, but whatever. I guess I'll not call anymore and just mention a "by the way, I tried calling you last week" and see what she says if she's at work next Saturday... btw, there was a number that called my house I did'nt recognize today, but it was different than hers.
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10-13-2008, 03:16 AM
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I hate to be the bearer of bad news but I really think this girl is playing games like jenny said. Its highly unlikely that her phone randomly shut down, AND everybody sees missed calls, its not like shes blind and didnt see the messages on her phone, especially since you called like three times. If you look at it from her point of view and she wasnt interested it was probably hard for her to say no to someone who is in a higher position at her job and she was probably too scared to turn you down. Girls try to be nice most of the time and they aren't going to tell you that they aren't interested right to your face. Her way of telling you was by ignoring your phone calls. And it really isn't a big deal, there are plenty of girls in the world, a ****load, and getting upset about one is a holy waste of time, especially when there is no romantic connection. My advice would be to move on. You saying that you have no time is a bad excuse, there is working a full time job and there is making time to meet people. You have to give each one some priority if you plan on having a relationship someday, there is no one or the other. If you focus on just one then you'll be dating without a job, which i dont reccomend, or you'll be working with no dating, which also sucks as you can account for. Make time. Try bangin a different coworker and make her jealous, that seems to work.
__________________
"Show me a good loser, and I'll show you a loser."
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10-13-2008, 11:05 AM
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Dude, just hit it and quit it.
Also, DO NOT say about you trying to call her last week. Act like you don't give a ****, she'll come running if she actually likes you.
__________________
Lifes a B!tch, but God forbid the b!tch divorce me Check my log http://bodybuildingforyou.com/forums/showthread.php?t=38857 and drop some comments
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10-13-2008, 01:24 PM
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Yeah, your right. The phone just rang today and I was thinking maybe it was her. It was'nt, but it was an older lady from work calling out of the blue. Guess what? She asked if I was dating anybody and if not she had a friend she thought I might like. I don't know about blind dates, have'nt had one in many years, but I guess it could'nt hurt. All I know about her is that she is a little closer to my age, supposedly is nice, but don't know what she looks like, ect.
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10-19-2008, 12:13 AM
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Update guys bad news: I finally saw her at work today. I played it cool for as long as I could then told her that I tried calling her last week. She said "oh yeah, I dropped my phone in the water and it has'nt been working right since then". I'm like ok. Then a little later I asked if that was her only phone. She says "I have an old land line"-pause-"I'll give it to you later". Well, I waited all night (trying to not act suspicious) and she never gave it to me. It could have slipped her mind as she was talking with a girlfriend about going out and getting drunk and also having a party at her house all day.
I also heard her say several times that nobody got her flowers today. I did'nt even know it was sweetest day, but would'nt have gotten her anything anyway since we have'nt even gone out yet. Then she went to lunch with a male "friend" I learned and came back with a single red rose. A couple weeks ago she did'nt have a boyfriend. So now I'm thinking she either has lots of "friends" or is playing games. Either way, I guess I need to move on or at least let her make the next move. I'm thinking my co-worker at my other job may be right. She is probably too young for me as she is all about partying and having a good time, while I'm not into that (I was done with that 20 years ago) and just want somebody to date and settle down with if it works out. Maybe I need to lower my standards and start replying to the older (usually 40+) , heavyset women that keep responding to my profiles. I just don't understand, I'm in decent shape, not bad looking and think I look younger than my age and yet can't land a date. Maybe I'm just too "nice".
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10-19-2008, 03:02 AM
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Man this sucks to hear, but if you want some real advice: GIVE UP ON THIS CHICK.
You two are obviously not made for each other. Get over it, maybe further down the road she'll realize that maybe you were it, and that she made a mistake, but don't bank on it. Don't lower your standards, keep them where they are. You should get the girl that you deserve, nothing less. Don't settle, and don't make someone else settle. You'll end up with the person you're meant to end up with.
__________________
Every time you hit him with a shot it's got to feel like he tried kissing the express train. Yeah, let’s start buildin some hurtin bombs.
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10-19-2008, 08:14 AM
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Quote:
Maybe you put her off by continually calling her and pestering her about it? That's the thing, maybe at one stage she thought there could be something between you, but doing all that pushed her away. You could of come across as being desperate. Sorry dude, but just move on, and if she does make a 'move' you'd be wise to ignore it so she knows she cant play you at a drop of a hat. Then you could get some control back, and find someone better.
__________________
Lifes a B!tch, but God forbid the b!tch divorce me Check my log http://bodybuildingforyou.com/forums/showthread.php?t=38857 and drop some comments
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10-19-2008, 08:55 PM
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I don't think I was be obsessive, I think I only tried calling her 3 times, never got thru and only asked her about her phone once at work (oh and if she had another phone). I mean if I had gotten a hold of her at least once or she said she was'nt interested, then I would'nt try anymore, but she never gave my a direct answer. The way she is sort of avoiding me is a way of giving an answer, although not very mature. But I guess that is to be expected of a girl her age and I'm guessing shes just keeping her options open at the moment. Yeah, I'm moving on for now and trying to meet new people if at all possible.
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