Guys at the Gym

[Sophie]

This is going to sound really weird, but is it normal for girls to get hit on at the gym? I mean, we're not talking about a few guys that keep talking to you about how great you look. I'm talking about not being able to go to the gym without guys commenting, asking for me phone number, asking me out on dates, etc.

Is this normal? And if it is, is it because I look "good" or because I'm one of the few girls who lift weights and don't live on the cardio machines? I've never been hit on before, evre, so all the attention is confusing me.

[narcsarge]

LOL! Yes ma'am it is kind of normal. For the reasons you suggest. But, you can shut it down by saying "I am sorry but like you I am here to work out. When I am done (if you want to) then I will talk with you. Thanks." Smile and go about your business. Women in the free weight area attracts attention in my gym but there are only about 5 or 6 that are regulars and they are pretty much left alone. Us neanderthals know they are there to work out. A simple hello and it is on to the next set.

[Cammo]

Your self esteem is good & that is picked up on by guys and is an attractive trait. It helps that you share a common interest with the guys that lift weights (something a lot more women should do but don't).

[narcsarge]

Originally Posted by Cammo

Your self esteem is good & that is picked up on by guys and is an attractive trait. It helps that you share a common interest with the guys that lift weights (something a lot more women should do but don't).

Touche sir. More women should hit the free weights. Ladies like you Sophie, Meera, Hawkwind, etc. that use free weights show women that the don't turn into men. Besides, it gets a little weird lifting around all men. We need the love!

[Trix]

Hi Sophie,

I used to get the same thing at the gym, at first, until the guys got to know me better and realised that I actually knew what I was doing. I was the only woman hanging out in the free weights section (that was a good 15 yrs ago btw).

A lot of women went to the machines area and, of course, in the cardio classes, etc... but none of them ever walked through to the free-weights area.

Same deal with the gym that we had at work - I was the only woman who ever set foot in the weights area. I trained there for a few years and I was the only one the whole time.

I really enjoyed training there and the guys were always helpful when I needed spotting, etc... they understood that I was there to train, just as they were. It was great

The men have all, always been super nice and very helpful. If women knew this, I think they'd go more... I think a lot of women are shy and don't know enough about lifting weights etc... and (gasp...) are afraid of bulking up (I could strangle some of the women when I hear them say that... It drives me nuts)

We have moved across the country now and I train at home. I'm expanding my home gym little by little - no time to go to a gym right now but I might go back eventually... I'm coming back to my love of weight training after a couple of nasty injuries back to back (nasty foot injury & I damaged 3 facet joints in my spine - not while working out btw and that one still bugs me after a couple of years of rehab work).

But all this to say that I'm starting to show some definition and I've got men that come over to say "hello" at the grocery store on a regular basis now!

And I'm not even dressed in the kind of outfits I'd wear to workout at the gym... and even the wedding ring doesn't seem to stop them hahahaha

The guys here are right, just tell the men at your gym that you're a serious lifter and that you look forward to training with them and that hopefully a few of them will be able to spot you from time to time. They'll be happy to help you and they will see you as a "bodybuilder" rather than just "a woman".

All I can say is that the majority of the guys lifting weights in gyms are super nice and they're the best kept secret ever!

[narcsarge]

Shhh Trix! We run away to the gym so no one will find that little secret out!

[Sophie]

They haven't really been interferring with my sets at all. They normally approach me when my foster dad is in the locker room or not with me. LOL. The other ones just stare at me and I'd wish they'd say something and not just stare.

They are always very polite. Telling me I have a great body and don't need to wkrout, to which I responded, "How do you think I got this way?" It's fun. I've just never got hit on before, by anyone anywhere, until this summer. It's just very new to me.

The first time I got hit on, I wasn't wearing real "gym clothes." I had on a loose tank top and shorts. Now that I've bought a sports braand been wearing that, I need a fence or something. Why can't guys hit on me where I live, instead of 400 miles away?

I always have my clipboard with me to write down the weight and reps. I haven't seen anyone else doing that. That's a little weird to me. As long as I've been working out, I've always kept track.

Anyway, this summer has definitely gave me a self esteem boost. LOL.

[narcsarge]

Good on ya! Let them eat cake. You don't have to believe what they say or act on it but compliments are good sign you are making noticable changes. Keep it up. A log is only for us that are into it.

[Yureeka47]

Originally Posted by Trix

Hi Sophie,

I used to get the same thing at the gym, at first, until the guys got to know me better and realised that I actually knew what I was doing. I was the only woman hanging out in the free weights section (that was a good 15 yrs ago btw).

A lot of women went to the machines area and, of course, in the cardio classes, etc... but none of them ever walked through to the free-weights area.

Same deal with the gym that we had at work - I was the only woman who ever set foot in the weights area. I trained there for a few years and I was the only one the whole time.

I really enjoyed training there and the guys were always helpful when I needed spotting, etc... they understood that I was there to train, just as they were. It was great

The men have all, always been super nice and very helpful. If women knew this, I think they'd go more... I think a lot of women are shy and don't know enough about lifting weights etc... and (gasp...) are afraid of bulking up (I could strangle some of the women when I hear them say that... It drives me nuts)

We have moved across the country now and I train at home. I'm expanding my home gym little by little - no time to go to a gym right now but I might go back eventually... I'm coming back to my love of weight training after a couple of nasty injuries back to back (nasty foot injury & I damaged 3 facet joints in my spine - not while working out btw and that one still bugs me after a couple of years of rehab work).

But all this to say that I'm starting to show some definition and I've got men that come over to say "hello" at the grocery store on a regular basis now!

And I'm not even dressed in the kind of outfits I'd wear to workout at the gym... and even the wedding ring doesn't seem to stop them hahahaha

The guys here are right, just tell the men at your gym that you're a serious lifter and that you look forward to training with them and that hopefully a few of them will be able to spot you from time to time. They'll be happy to help you and they will see you as a "bodybuilder" rather than just "a woman".

All I can say is that the majority of the guys lifting weights in gyms are super nice and they're the best kept secret ever!

I dont know about other guys, but I never notice wedding rings on anyone, yet I notice for women, its one of the first things they look for lol.

There is a woman that weightlifts, and alll the guys talk to her. I say hi too, but we don't really have conversations or anything.

[Cammo]

I strike up conversations with girls/women in the gym all the time whether they're there for cardio or weight training. I don't hit on them but if the circumstances are appropriate I enjoy good conversation. That's half the problem with womens attitudes to guys in the free weight section - they think we're all neanderthals that couldn't string a sentence together if we tried.

I'm on a one man crusade to change that!

Actually......at the end of some of my workouts I do actually find it harder to keep up a good conversation - probably because I'm so stuffed!!!!

[meera]

Originally Posted by Sophie

......
Anyway, this summer has definitely gave me a self esteem boost. LOL.

I can sense that in you Sophie...well done girl! It all pays at the end of the day eh? Pain = Gain.

[meera]

Originally Posted by narcsarge

..... You don't have to believe what they say or act on it but compliments are good sign you are making noticable changes. Keep it up. ....

As long as there are men and women training alongside each other this will always happen. I have learnt to wear my cap real low on my face, plug my ears with earphones and disappear into my "private" training world. Most guys get the message but you get the odd ones that will still try and talk to you over the headphones! I have received comments like: you train really well or are you training for competition or how long you been training. Once this dude was too shy perhaps and instead gave me compliments through a woman who worked at the gym. I left my previous gym and bumped into this other guy, at a shopping centre, who used to train there but we never ever spoke, and he asked me why I had left and accidentally let it slip that he missed me!

So this flirting/complimenting will go on in any gyms, you just have to let it fly over the top of your head and carry on with your training.

[Sophie]

Recovering from anorexia and all, it's just hard to believe I'm getting complemented how how I look. They don't interfer with my training. They normally interfer with me leaving the gym. LOL. It's like guys place themselves at strategic locations towards the exit to tell me I look good and we should go out.

[Trix]

Originally Posted by Yureeka47

I dont know about other guys, but I never notice wedding rings on anyone, yet I notice for women, its one of the first things they look for lol.

There is a woman that weightlifts, and alll the guys talk to her. I say hi too, but we don't really have conversations or anything.

I should have added however, that I do not wear any jewelry (that includes my wedding ring and band), nor do I wear any make-up when I workout... so there would be no ring to notice on my finger (maybe a bit of a tan line, but I don't sunbathe much, so not much of a line there either)

I do have my jewelry when I go to the supermarket, and that's where the guys don't notice it hahaha

In all honesty, I much prefer to train with guys (although, I would gladly train with any of the women here on this board) because the guys I've met in the gyms are serious about bodybuilding, whereas I've seen women try to come in there with make-up and all their jewelry hanging about, hair all done up fancy, etc... and, well, I'm serious about my workouts and I'm totally allergic to women who think that sweating is something to avoid at all cost or their mascara will start running!!!! That just makes me wanna scream....

[Trix]

Originally Posted by narcsarge

Shhh Trix! We run away to the gym so no one will find that little secret out!

Ok, Ok... I won't scream it at the top of the roof.... hehehe

[CubanChick]

How true it is!!! The same can be said for women hitting on men in gyms. I see it all the time. I see many married men/women picking up, they call it a meat market. I have gotten hit on many times, but when they realize that I am just being friendly and there is no chance, they chill out and leave me to my workout. I am probably the only hispanic woman at the time I go in the morning, mostly blondes/red heads...!!! So I sometimes find that some of the guys will chit/chat with me too, because of the different scenary!!.

Sometimes its all in good fun, sometimes its down right annoying.

[mckittn]

LOL.. I think it could be annoying too. I go to the gym to workout not meet men. Especially when they motion for you to take your earphones out.

[narcsarge]

Originally Posted by Sophie

Recovering from anorexia and all, it's just hard to believe I'm getting complemented how how I look. They don't interfer with my training. They normally interfer with me leaving the gym. LOL. It's like guys place themselves at strategic locations towards the exit to tell me I look good and we should go out.

Sophie, considering your background, and what you have taught me, those of us in the gym are really into "looking good"! The fact that the other sex notices is always a good thing, IMHO, because other then our own well being, we would to think others find us attractive. In the 2 years I have been at my gym, only one female has made any comment about my appearance. She liked my shoulders. More of the men will tell me that I have changed but not too many women. And, like CAmmo, I am polite and smile to all the members. Just my way of saying welcome! Nothing more.

[Daniel141]

That's great, as long as it's not mess